Bitter-Sweet Spring

Last semester of school (spring 2013) was a beast for me! For the first time in my life, I did not get strait A's and an occasional B. In fact, I received mainly C+ grades last semester. For those of you who know me, this is not typical of me. I have always valued my education and it is important to me to do exceptional. Do not think that I finally just decided to relax a little about school. Believe me, I was going turbo! I just struggled learning the concepts I needed to for my classes. It did not help that one of my professors did not show up half the time and he tested us from a book that was not listed in the syllabus nor did he tell us what book it was. Anyway, this past semester of school really dampened my moral and took a huge blow to my confidence. I even questioned my self worth because my entire life, I accredited my strengths and worth to my academic career then suddenly an earthquake hit my track record.

One day towards the end of the semester (late March) I found myself walking out the testing center again. I was able to see my score before I left. I definitely failed another test (failed test number 9 for the semester).  To get back to campus from the testing center at UVU, you have to cross this massive parking lot. It takes me about seven minutes to walk across it at a comfortable pace. So I was walking across this massive parking lot; it was so cold and windy. I had a break down and I was angry and sad. Just as I started to do the cry-hiccup (sobbing), I heard a tender voice say to my heart, "Sarah, you are my daughter and that is most important." My tears turned to tears of joy and suddenly, the stress and anger that I had been carrying for months did not matter anymore. I was okay with my current academic status of failing which probably sounds strange. I am so grateful to know that Heavenly Father was aware of me when I felt the lowest and made everything better. I am so grateful for the comfort that brings my heart because He was not aware of me just at that moment of distress, He is aware of me always.

Provo Temple Grounds :)

Alex and I had a beautiful date just walking around the grounds at the Provo Utah LDS Temple. It has been rainy all day and it was great! These are some of the pictures I got with my phone :) Alex took some good ones too!

Fall 2013 Here I Come!

(I loved sitting by this beautiful pond in the tops of the mountains pondering)

As I was reading the book " Increase in Learning: Spiritual Patterns for Obtaining Your Own Answers" by Elder David A. Bednar, I came across this paragraph. It makes me think about the way I learn and study things. It also makes me think about why I do the things I do and behave the way I behave and think the way I think. It reads as follows:

" Clearly we must use our minds and our rational capacity; however, we are not explicitly counseled to apply our minds, but our hearts, in seeking for understanding. Perhaps the implications of the scriptures is that reason and "the arm of flesh" (Doctrine and Covenants 1:19) are not sufficient to engender true understanding. The word understanding as used in the scriptures does not refer solely or even primarily to intellectual or cognitive comprehension. Rather, when the Holy Ghost confirms in our hearts as true what we know in our minds, understanding occurs.

" We begin to understand and experience a mighty change of heart as testimony and conviction more from our heads to our hearts. Thoughts and feelings put into our hearts by the Holy Ghost (see Doctrine and Covenants 100: 5-8, 8:2) are a result of the spiritual gift of revelation. Understanding, then, is a revealed conclusion and a spiritual gift."

Even though Elder Bednar is talking about understanding doctrinal concepts and gospel principles, I think this applies to many things that are not primarily spiritual in nature. We learn in the Book of Mormon that every good thing comes from Jesus Christ. I think modern medicine is good. I think literature is amazing. I even think mathematics is a good thing. What I am trying to get at is that if we learn of good things whether they be academic, or just everyday skills, the Holy Ghost will testify of the truth of those concepts because they are good and all good things come from Jesus Christ. The Holy Ghost's purpose is to testify of Jesus Christ so would it not make sense that the Holy Ghost would testify of good things if they come from Jesus even if it is something as ordinary as mathematics?

As I approach this next semester at UVU, I want to take time to ponder and study the things I learn in my classes and pray about them. I hope that by doing this, the Holy Ghost will help me understand the concepts I will learn and help me know how to apply them. He will help me know why the things I learn are important. I hope that by praying about the things I learn in school I will come closer to my Heavenly Father because I am taking time to ponder His hand in my life and in the world's. I think if we pondered about academic concepts, we could see Heavenly Father in all things. I know one thing for sure: I like God more than I like school! So hopefully by working on this goal, school will become more enjoyable because I will learn more of my Heavenly Father.