Just a Thought

I am an out-loud thinker. Often times by thoughts and opinions are solidified as I speak to other people. Not that I don't think before I speak. I think about it, but the subject is solidified when I say it. This method can be embarrassing sometimes because once in a while, the thought just popped into my head as I was speaking and I didn't think about the consequences of what I said. Believe me, I think way to much sometimes, but there those rare occasions that I wish I would have thought about it more. As I see the consequence of my words, I realize how much power of influence is in each of us. The more I realize this, the more I want to be a positive power influence for other people.  One of my biggest problems is, I talk about my problems to others. I feel this could be detrimental because it may remind others of negative things in their own lives. I saw this quote on Pinterest and I think it could help me (and other people too) as I try to build others up rather than talk about my issues and concerns with them.

I have also given another idea some thought too thanks to Pinterest. This other quote said, " Have you prayed about it as much as you have talked about it?" The idea came to mind that if I actually did this, my problems wouldn't seem as big, I would sound more educated, and I would feel more at peace. I try my best to talk to Heavenly Father first especially if it is concerning things that could effect other people. For example: I seek council from Heavenly Father about my one of my dearest friends before I talk to my parents and and other friends. Doing this has given me a better understanding and appreciation for him. This also helps me to not be detracted from what is true and real from "what-if's" and personal feelings from others. As I have applied this to other things, life has become so much easier! I am not as stressed about issues and the answer to problems seems to come quicker as I turn to Heavenly Father. I hope that you would try this. It works.

Not-So-Great Expectations

Ever since I was little, I have had high expectations for myself. I have always felt the need to be the best. For example,  when I was six in first grade, I had to have more pencils than Jason Tatton. Later I had to be better than Michella Turner at basketball. Now, I don't feel that I need to be better than people, in fact, I prefer to help other people and encourage them rather than compete against them, but I expect nothing but the best from myself. I feel so excited on those rare occasions that I feel that I worked my hardest and achieved the results that I wanted. Those rare occasions are becoming more frequent and I feel more accomplished as I make an effort to progress everyday.

Here is the problem. I set high expectations for other people. I expect people to treat me a certain way especially those I have relationships with. I expect people to be completely honest with me. I expect them to work as hard as I do and put in as much energy as I do as I try to help, strengthen, and love them. When it comes down to it, I just want people to put as much into me as I do them. This is a big problem. Maybe I shouldn't have these kind of expectations for other people. If I didn't expect so much, then I would never be disappointed. So I am going to drop all expectations I have of other people and be thankful for what they actually give. I want to learn to accept people for who they are. I want to learn to love the strengths and weakness of others. I want to learn to love other people unconditionally without expecting anything in return. I want to dedicate each day to serving someone else. This should change my attitude if I focus on others right?

Flower's in Jars

 Flowers are pretty much the coolest thing in this world next to glitter, glow sticks, and microwaves. I have always loved to garden. Playing in the dirt is therapeutic for me. So is anything with color especially pink. I saw these terrariums online that were in blown-glass orbs and I really wanted to try it. I have not been able to find orbs, but I found old salt shakers at the DI in Price. So to tie this all together, I planted whimsical pink flowers in salt shakers just for kicks and giggles.

 My mom liked the idea and handed me other little jars to put the remaining flowers in. This activity was quite exciting and fun for me. I didn't even have to be outside. There was a severe wind warning for this area and gardening would have been impossible. I have the coolest mom! She let me bring dirt into the house and work on the kitchen table. Be jealous.

Rasberry Tarts

So once upon a time I had this friend that loves sweets, but has chosen not eat any lately. This made me think, I haven't made my favorite treat lately: pie. I love to make pies and it has been about six months since I have made one. I saw these cute little pies on pinterest made in a muffin pan. Did I try it out? You betcha!They didn't hold together so well out of the pan, but they were a good little snack!

*nineteen*

I am so blessed! I have never been without the support of friends and mostly family for my entire life. I may forget this sometimes, but I have always had a support system. I could look at most everyone on my contact list in my phone and feel comfortable calling them just to say hi or ask for help or just to talk. Earlier this week, I forgot about this and was not expecting people to remember by birthday due to recent events. I was wrong! People started texting me "happy birthday" at 1:25 a.m. this morning. This was a first haha. I remember in high school, I would get tons of messages on facebook or even people in the halls telling me happy birthday, but today was the first time it was narrowed down the the people who actually care about me. I was even surprised by a few messages I got today.

My mom actually came up yesterday to take me to lunch for my birthday. She brought me a present of course. She gave me a pocket watch on a necklace, two Jane Austin books, hangers, envelopes, pens, notepad, and a grocery bag. I wanted/needed these for a while now so it was a pleasant surprise. Guess what she wrapped these in! Paper doilies! It was the cutest thing ever. She also bought we one other gift as we went shopping. We found this beautiful picture of a dead tree, an old fence, and my favorite scripture painted on the bottom. I literally cried because I was so happy when I saw it. If you know anything about me, I love dead trees and old fences so this was perfect. Also, I don't cry over things like that because generally I am not a sentimental person.

Today, my Aunt Bonnie made me a beautiful cake. She spent hours piping the frosting on it and making it just right. She also took me and my dear friend Ashley Allred to dinner. Ashley and I went to see The Avengers before dinner. That may or may not be my new favorite movie :)

 My sweet boyfriend Alex Fish sent me gigantic chocolate covered strawberries in the mail with a sweet little note to go with them! He is in Missouri for work right now. I thought I might get a card from him in the mail so I was very surprised.  How thoughtful was that?! His family also sent me birthday wishes today which I was not expecting either. Let's just say that I really did feel special today :) I am so blessed!

Why it is Hard for me to Focus

Just to give you an idea of what goes on in my thought process, I thought I would share a few questions and thoughts that pop into my head more than once :) These are all connected in my brain, but I don't want to take time to explain how they are connected. Please know if I get distracted when I talk with you it isn't because I am not listening.  I am interested and what you said made me think. 

Why does color make me so happy? Why do people like the color orange? oompa loompas are orange. If I had to be a color, it would have to be either yellow or hot pink.Why are babies so flexible and strong and healthy? If we treated ourselves like we take care of babies, no one would ever die! Can someone teach me the shortcut key strokes on the key board? Who came up with those anyways? Speaking of genius, cottage cheese and strawberries. Try it. Your life will never be the same. Same thing with cold tacos from taco time but in a negative way. Who came up with the word Mexichanca?! Hilarious. Do you know what is hilarious? Pimples! I don't understand this one and apparently neither do the genius' who make face wash and acne cream because it doesn't work. period. Do long mustaches itch? Why does Alex Fish want one. Why doesn't Alex Fish like glitter? This is tragic.  Why do they make automatic car? If people drove stick, cell phones would not even be an option while driving because you would not have a free hand. Speaking of free hand, I want to learn how to write short hand.  Do I have a facebook stalker? He better be cute. I hope my cute boy would beat up my cute stalker if he ever found out about him. Why are weddings so complicated and expensive? I don't want to be a part of this one. period. I want to watch and go home and not write about it in my journal.  What kind of flower was that?! Why do people think that what they think is best for me is? It is so hard for me to make decisions for myself when people who are close to me tell met the opposite of what I want to do and what I feel. How does the root system for grass work?
Do I have a twin? Was he sold at birth? Yes it would be a he. I like boys better than girls haha.  Why do guys not understand the concept of special occasions and holidays? Why do you have to tell most step by step instructions when you want/need their help? How many people will remember my birthday this week? How will I learn to adapt to people not paying attention to my birthday now that I am older. I don't want to feel bad if my family doesn't remember. They have so much going on in their own lives, I should be more worried about how I can help them. How do they make toothpicks?! seriously. What shirt am I going to wear today and how will I fix my hair to match the shirt? What time is it? How come no mater what when the time has a 7 in it do I automatically round it up to the next ten minute interval? For example if It is 9:37 it is really 9:40 in my brain. Or if it is 3:07 it is really 3:10. I have got to fix this. This is 144 minutes that I take from myself everyday.

If I keep this up, I am going to be one confused old lady with dementia!

Time to Run

Another goal I have for this summer is to develop a morning schedule that includes waking up before 7 a.m., 30 minutes of running/exercise, eat a nutritious breakfast, and have a solid scripture study. Well guess what! I did all these things today minus the waking up before 7 part. It was more like 8:39. . . . oops.

I am currently living with my Great Aunt Bonnie. I decided it was safe to run in her neighborhood considering half her ward is over 70 most nearing 80.  My mom would be so proud of me! I remembered to put sun screen on. You would think I would remember that more often because I am so white, but I forget a lot.  It felt so good to run.  I thought I would have a hard time because my asthma has been acting up lately, but I actually feel better than I did before. My allergies are not as bad either even though I ran past those shrubs of death that normally put me into a sneezing fit for a half hour.

I want to run for a reason. I want my asthma to improve, and after one day, I think this might just help. I have felt tired the last week or so and I thought that running would make me more tired, but it actually energized me. I made one mistake though. I ran down a hill that had to be 100% steep. I was doing ok and then I tripped. Then I rolled my ankle trying to catch myself from slamming my face on the hill. Don't think anybody wasn't watching, because this old guy was trying not to laugh as he asked if I was okay. Old people. Oddly, I felt I needed to keep running and now my ankle is fine.

Do you know what the best part about my morning run was? All the beautiful gardens!!! I love flowers. I was in heaven. There is no other way to describe how excited I was to see those flowers. It was so neat to see every yard with a well kept garden.  I could probably spend hours looking at all the flowers! I don't know what these flowers are, but I think they are my favorite find of the day.

Step One: Done!

Just so you know, I like to be doing something always. With school being over and the CAL program on hold, I have many hours of free time. I decided to reevaluate and come up with new goals to work on this summer until school starts up again. A few things on my list include hiking Mount Timpanogus, learn how to play the guitar, and find a job within the next month. I am not the most sentimental person, but I decided I wanted to do something to connect me to my ancestors so i want to learn how to make doilies.
My first planned step to accomplish this goal was to look up understandable instructions and try it out. My Sugar (grandma) taught me how to crochet so this was a huge benefit. I have done scarves and hot pads before, but doilies are much more complicated. I thought it would be wise to turn to the all powerful YouTube for instructions to make a doily. This was a good choice. Thank you dear lady with the raspy southern accent! I made my first doily today! I didn't have the right size of crochet hook so my stitches are a little loose. It is about the size of a silver dollar.  For a first try, I think this looks pretty good!

I want to eventually make more elaborate ones, but I will definitely need to practice some simple ones first. I want to learn how to make doilies like my Great Great Grandma Martino. I will inherit a few of hers when I am older. Maybe I can make beautiful doilies for my grandchildren to have too. This is one of Grandma Martino's doilies. I have some work to do :)

(mine next to grandma's)

Bridal Shower

Over the past month, I have had a stressful schedule. I had to study and take finals. I finished my first year in the very prestigious CAL program. I spent many hours communicating with the National Multiple Sclerosis Society. I moved into a new place to live while leaving my old apartment in a state no less than perfection. My best friend moved and I have limited communication with him. I finished school.I tried to make up time I lost with another best friend. But in the middle of all of this I planned and carried out a bridal shower! Even though I had almost too much on my plate, everything worked out in the end. I pushed my limits and found out a little more of what I am capable of. However, I didn't really plan on a bridal shower in that mix.
A total of 59 people were invited, but only 17 came. I planned on at least 30; I guess I should be glad that somebody showed up. It was an open house style bridal shower so people could come and go as they wanted. Lemon bars, brownies, and chocolate covered strawberries prepared for the guest. I thought that they would just pick one like any courteous person would do, but the first round of guest took one of everything. I panicked and thought we were going to run out of desserts so my mom offered to go buy some more at the store. The majority of the guest left before the first hour was even over. The rest of the afternoon went pretty slow. Needless to say, we had plenty of leftovers without the last minute run for more lemon treats, a tiny mess, and many awkward silent moments.
I didn't want to focus on the things that went slightly wrong, but talk about the small and simple things that made the day doable. I am so thankful for my mother! She opened up her house for the shower! She decorated, made lemon bars, and helped me in more ways than she realizes. My grandma came an hour and a half early to help me make the finishing touches. She also baked and bought strawberries and dipping chocolates. My aunts also helped with buying necessary items too. I was a little stressed out about how much money I have put into this shower. I asked the other bridesmaids if they could help me pay for the expenses of the party and most of them were so willing to help out. How blessed am I to have these people in my life! I am so thankful for their willingness and service towards me. I felt so much love and support from my family. I felt them taking some stress off of my shoulders. Their love made this flop of a party worth it. I learned a little more just how much my family wants to help me because they love me. What a blessing it is to have a family like mine!

Party Favors!

I am hosting a bridal shower open house for my aunt-to-be. I have everything lined up and now it is just a matter of actually setting everything into place. Well, I thought I had everything ready, but I never thought about doing party favors for it. We are giving out free brownies, lemon bars, and your choice of tropical drink or water. I thought that was enough, but I guess not. Luckily I have my mom to tell me things like that. My mom is such a creative genius! She got this thank you from the primary presidency (she works in the nursery) that was a little water bottle with a cute little thank you note and a crystal light drink mix. I decided to make something similar to it since "hydration is key" according to my best friend and if I am going to be even more courteous, why not take care of their most basic need right? To make thirty of these, it only cost six dollars! Call me awesome. It's okay.

Old Time Nights

I am currently visiting home to see my family in Price, Utah. I came to organize and host a bridal shower for my almost Aunt Lacey. Everything is starting to come together and I am excited to write about it afterwards!

In my psychology 1010 class we learned about the group think method. From what I understand, group think is when you do things when you are with a group that you would never do by yourself. Sadly, I probably do these things if I was by my self anyway. So, last night two of my good friends invited me to go "creepin" with them. We put on loud costume makeup and posed by random things. The first thing they wanted to take a picture by was the billboard in the park where the hobos live. I was a little skeptical still about this whole climbing on a rusty billboard thing so I volunteered to take the picture. Later though in a safer part of town, they taught me about a thing called OWLING. This is where you sit on your toes on a random object. We chose these poles that block a fire hydrant from the parking lot. They were up to my mid-waist if I stood next to them. I don't understand why I did this, but it was whimsical, fun, and very much like a Sarah thing to do :)